That's It. Time For Change.

I threw out my back again for the second time since May.  I have a weak core, which means I have a weak back.  This time it's really bad.  I am wearing the ugliest back brace you've ever seen, and I can't even take care of my son.  If he cries, someone else has to pick him up.  It's awful. 

I hate it.

It's time seriously, and I mean SERIOUSLY make some changes in my habits.  I don't want Wesley to grow up eating the way I do now.  He's watching what we eat, and what better motivation to make some changes so that I can teach my child that fruits and veggies are nummy?  I want him to take pride in his appearance and feel good. 
I feel awful about myself.  I don't like how I look or how I feel.  And I don't want to teach that to my son.

I made a call to a local fitness bootcamp in Tacoma today.  I'll call them back tomorrow.  I need to talk to my chiropractor to see if my body is ready for something like that as of Monday, or if I need to wait a little longer. 

It sucks that it took my back feeling THIS BAD to give me a serious wake-up call.  But sometimes that has to happen in order to make life better.

And can I tell you how excited I am to purge the pantry next week?  It's going to be a good day.

Things can only go up from here.

Exercise #1

35 minute walk today during lunch. Things just haven't gone my way today, and I'm stressed and overwhelmed! Thankfully it is NOT raining so I grabbed my iPod and walked along Marymoore Creek. I feel much better now.

My best

So I have a couple of friends who are on a weight loss/fitness plan, and I have to say, there's not a bigger motivator for me than to keep myself in line with others. I'm working really hard at cutting back on sugar. Even with making cookies yesterday, I only had one. And today someone brought in gingerbread squares, and I only had one. While yes, my original goal is no sugar, I'm doing my best.

This week I'm getting back into my "normal" schedule. I say "normal" because I've been in shows for the last 7 months, and I can't really remember what "normal" is anymore. This gives me a little time to figure out meal plans, clean out the fridge, and focus on healthy eating habits. Next week I'll figure out my workout routine, which will probably be a few weekday walks during lunch, (especially now that the weather *should* start warming up), BodyRock TV, and a weekly Zoomba class at the community center. I've heard good things about that class, and I am eager to check it out. I figure if I keep the activities changing, then my body will respond appropriately.

Why the push? Not only do I just want to look better and feel better, but I'm in a HUGE wedding in June. I want to look good in those pictures, and feel better about myself over all. I'll be using the blog and facebook to hold myself accountable. So far, week one hasn't gone bad. Not perfect, but hey, everyone has to start somewhere, right?

I finally went for my first lunch walk yesterday. It wasn't pouring rain, and by 1pm I was nodding off. Instead of trying to fall asleep for a little bit, I took a 35 minute brisk walk to get the blood moving. I felt so much better, and wide awake. I'm going to do it again today, this afternoon, rain or shine. With the crazy rehearsal schedule creeping in these next few weeks, it's really important for me to keep this up, at least 3 to 5 days a week. And now that my work hours are changing, I just might have some time to try Zuzana's workouts too.

I know, I know, it's been awhile.

And my apologies. Life gets me sidetracked, and frankly it's been easier (and faster) to update the goings on of life via facebook and twitter rather than trying to come up with a witty paragraph or pouring my heart out online.

Rehearsals are going well. We are three weeks in and already off book! I am so impressed and honored to be part of this show.

Work is fine. I've been fighting off a cold and stayed home yesterday. I am feeling better, except that I was a bad girl last night and had a chocolate macaroon after 9pm, therefore last night's sleep wasn't as restful. When will I learn that I shouldn't have sugar at night? Why must I test this theory, especially when I'm fighting off an illness?

I miss my friends in L.A. I miss having weekdays off and being able to get things done. I sometimes loathe spending 2 hours a day in the car, only to be home for an hour or so before leaving for rehearsal. I can tell that I'm going to miss L.A.'s winter weather of sun and warmth. This cold weather changes is already starting to get to me.

Next weekend I'm taking a few days of vacation and heading to Spokane to visit family. Technically, I'll only be in the Spokane area. As my grandpa passed away a few years ago, he was the only blood relative that lived there the last few times I visited. Now I'll be sticking around Nine Mile Falls and St. John. Matt has several cousins that live in Spokane proper, though, and I'm hoping to see them too. I'll be cramming quite a bit into 4 days. I will likely need a vacation from my vacation!

My poor elliptical machine. I bought it just before I got a part in the play. And I really want to use it. After rehearsals are done and the performances are in full swing, I'll be using that sucker more often.

Calm Before The Storm

So most of you know that we're doing all we can to move to Tacoma in February, yes?  

Ok.

We are supposed to be hearing from two more lenders this week about pre-approval and a grant program that would give us extra $$ towards our down payment, closing costs, or whatever.  We are pretty sure we've picked our our realtor but want to meet with another one just to be sure.  We narrowed our favorite houses from 25 to 10 to 4, most of them being in the vicinity of Fred Meyer and 6th Ave.  :)  We are taking a first-time home buyers class on the 28th in Parkland.  

It's a crazy time in my head these days and I'm really grateful I've been exercising so much (even though I'm the weakest in my class - grrr) because otherwise no one would want to talk to me, much less comfort me when I call all stressed and anxious because I'm trying to learn about what's going on.  Too many terms and numbers were floating around in my head last week.  

Oh, and on a completely different subject, my in-laws have a blog about their adventures in Istanbul!  You can read it here.  Enjoy!

-insert title here-

A few major decisions have been made but nothing to be updated yet.  Still in the waiting process. 

I wish I could say I've been busy, but my part-time job doesn't have much going on for me now, which is going to make the holidays a little financially challenging (looks like people are getting recipes in a jar again this season).  

I've been to my new fitness bootcamp several times in the last three weeks - only missed one day - and I can already feel the difference.  Now if I could only see it.

Booked our tickets for Christmas, we'll be in town 12/26-1/2.  Hoping to see PNB's Nutcracker and visit with family at a cabin in white pass.  Wondering what to do for New Year's.  I think crashing someone's party sounds like fun.

It's great to have Matt home.  I missed the giggling in the morning.

Loss and Gain

This year has been an interesting one.  I've had many friends move away, and they're not done yet.  It's difficult for me to see my friends go as they're my family down here.  We all rely on each other, see and support one another through ups and downs.  Every time one leaves, I feel as though I've been "dumped".  I know that sounds harsh, but when then latest friends told me they were leaving, I just burst into tears.  I can't help it.  Even when I was little, I was incredibly attached to my friends, never wanting them to leave, always feeling like there was just never enough time...to do or say what, I'm not sure, but I still feel that way now.  That there's just not enough time with the people I care for.  

I got my hubby back though, after him being away for 9 days location scouting in WA.  It's prompted a huge and long drawn-out talk about the future and what we want to do.  However, as my MIL says:  "If you want to make God laugh, make a plan."  So we're keeping our options slightly open because life is definitely full of surprises.  But in the meantime, I'm working hard to stay on track.  I have goals and I plan to see them through.  When they'll happen, well, I can't plan everything.  Sometimes I just have to be flexible and patient.  

I also became a fan of the bootcamp I attended all last week!  I am so proud of myself.  It was my free week and since I enjoyed it so much and did so well, they're offering me a payment plan so I can afford to go back for the six week special.  I plan on going every day or as much as possible so I can really get in shape and feel better about myself, feel more confident.  I'm lucky to have a spouse who thinks I'm beautiful and tells me so every day.  I just wish I could feel that way about myself that often.  But back to bootcamp, it's run by these 2 amazing women who really work with you to see your fitness goals through while working with your individual limitations.  I'm excited to see what differences I'll have in 6 weeks! 

OW!

This was my third morning at bootcamp. 

I can't believe I've gone 3 days in a row.  If you know me well, you know that I take after Grandma Betty and am a night-owl at heart.  So getting up at 6am isn't really my favorite thing.  Especially when my lower body hurts so much (getting up, sitting down, walking, stairs are currently evil).  Hopefully tomorrow's visit to the chiropractor and my schedule massage will help my aching, screaming muscles.

The upside is my stress level has continued to go down and so has my appetite.  Well, my appetite is as hearty as it ever was, but I certainly can't eat as much as I used to.  I really like the trainers, they have lots of stretching exercises before and after the workouts as opposed to the other bootcamp I attended earlier this year.  You know, the one that said it was my fault that I got injured?  Yeah, right.  Anyway, I think this could be a good fit, and I'm hoping to squeeze some $$ out of the budget so I can sign up for the 6 week special sometime next week.  I plan on going the rest of the week since it's free, and then give my body a few days to recover before torturing my muscles again.  

We all know that I get bored quickly.  We'll see how long this lasts!

Like a fish in water

Gayvin and I have been going swimming 3 times a week for almost the past month and I can't believe how much I'm enjoying it. It's far less impactful on my joints and I feel as though I'm burning more calories. I think I'm even starting to show some weight loss around my mid-section which is always a good thing! I may not be a size 6 ever again, but I'm doing my best to look and feel good about the body I have been given. The best part is going with a friend and talking part of the time. Then we start doing laps and it's great to have someone else there to keep tabs and motivate you. I am motivated by her being in constant motion, always trying to keep up with her.

Every Thursday we have a little routine. We go swimming and then head over to downtown Glendale for the farmers' market to split lunch at a delightful little cafe called The Lunchbox. We split the amazing gyro sandwich - the best one since I've left Seattle - and munch to on delicious chips and a drink. All for under $10 total! With the exception of today, we then usually hit the farmers' market and wind up feeling really good about how we've spent our day and how we are being good to ourselves and our health. Going swimming always puts me at ease. I release so much pent up stress, anxiety, even anger and sadness. I wish we could go every day, but I guess 3 times a week will have to do!

Bonus to living in Southern California - I get to go swimming in an outdoor pool year-round!

Going UP?

There is nothing like hiking up and up to tell you how out of shape you are (still). But I did better than I thought I would, and overall yesterday morning was a perfect day for a hike at the Los Angeles National forest. We didn't find our original destination - the waterfall. Instead we stayed on the fire road (did I mention the trail went UP). My calves are still feeling it this morning!

A family pic.

Beautiful views all the way UP.

Paige and Katy rock!

The Early girls.

At the top!

Work It!

I really committed to my workout this week. When I showed up this morning, my trainer commented that he was impressed with my turnout and asked what my motivation was. I said "Hawaii in May, that's my goal!" He nodded and said he'd help get me there. I feel so good after exercising. My stress level is down, I am more aware of what I'm eating, and I feel so much better about myself. My muscles are getting bigger too! I can definitely notice more definition in my clothes, specially my jeans. Matt pointed out that I've started losing weight again, in my face and neck. While I haven't lost weight, I've lost inches and that's huge. I feel so much better about my body when my clothes fit better. I find that I'm also inspired by all of my girlfriends who work out on a regular basis. We check in on each other, and that's so encouraging and helpful!

Things to do:

My mind is just reeling with all that we have to get done in the next 3 weeks. And yes, while I work from home, I've actually had stuff to do and things to learn -- I'm not a graphic designer by nature so I'm learning as I go and it's fun but kind of frustrating -- this means I'm not sitting around all day twidling my thumbs and wishing for something to do. So the last few days, towards the end of the day, I've spent an hour to two hours on the phone with vendors. Changing the address, getting our new land line phone number, canceling Time Warner Cable (HECK YEAH!! They don't service our new city!! We have to stay in Glendale forever for this reason.), setting up new accounts, changing the addres with the post office, etc etc etc. Did I mention that we have to pay our new rent at the start of the month in addition to possibly owing about 1/2 month's rent to our current place? Don't get me started, it's 2am and I'm cranky.

In any case, I am very excited about our new place. For those of you on Facebook, I posted pictures of it unfurnished so you can see what it looks like. I'm thinking of getting some area rugs eventually, to add some warmth and color, but first we'll have to play around with the arrangement of furniture and save some money. After all, our checking account is taking a bit of an unexpected hit this month. But that's ok, because in the long run, this will all be worth it.

Thank goodness for fitness bootcamp. If I wasn't exercising regulary (in addition to going to my counseling sessions once a week), I think my head might explode!

Patience isn't a virtue of mine.

With the recession and Matt getting laid off from his part time job, our finances are incredibly tight. So this week we started looking around for cheaper places to live, something in the neighborhood that is much cheaper and could save us up to 600 bucks a month. So far, I'm checking out two places tomorrow - one in Glendale and one in Valley Village. Saturday we are going to visit one in Silverlake, and that's the one I really want. It's still in our neighborhood, the price is right, the area is adorable, and the apartment even has a deck! Not only that, we'd be saving over $500 a month, which is HUGE. So, again, I'm really excited and hope that it's the place we are meant to be, but I just have to be patient and see what happens.

Of course, all this talk of saving money means that we aren't eating out nearly as much as we used to. I'm enjoying meal planning much more and with my weight loss goal in check, I love looking up new and healthy recipes. Yesterday I went back to fitness bootcamp and while my muscles were screaming at me that it had been a long time since they'd been worked this way, today I'm not sore. At all. Which means I'm getting used to this! I'll certainly go back tomorrow, and plan on going every M/W/F for the next five weeks. I plan on going in February too, and then might cut back on the bootcamp so I can go to yoga more often. Again, I just have to be patient and enjoy where I'm at right now. At least I've gone down one dress size, and I'm feeling really good about that!

Happy New Year!

I always make resolutions, and ultimately I reach them in some way. I only have a few this year, and of course, one is to loose weight. But I need to stop measuring myself on the scale because the more I work out, the stronger my muscles get and I start loosing inches, which is good! I'm down to a size 10 now, which is FABuLOUS! I love it. This just encourages me to go to fitness bootcamp more regularly.

I have a big motivator for this year - a trip to Hawaii in May. So not only do I want to lose a few inches, I also want to get healthy, and that means eating better. I start January 5th, focusing on low-fat but tasty foods. Cooking light and the cooking blog will be very helpful, as will the Master Cook program which tells me how much fat and how many calories are in the dishes we eat.

I am on my way to becoming a better person, sharing time and energy with friends and family. I enjoy cooking more and more and have found that it's ok to say "no" when I don't want to do something. At the same time, I'm becoming more open to new experiences while attempting to be more thrifty.

More on this later, I must join my MIL for another game of Scrabble! May you have a joyous, happy and prosperous 2009!

Recovery...kind of...

I went back to bootcamp yesterday and my legs hurt pretty bad this morning. Of course, I went back today for more (we have a shortened week due to the holiday) and we have a new trainer on Tuesdays and Thursdays now. His name is Nandoor and he is a human version of the energizer bunny. I don't know where he gets it or what he's on, but I came away feeling utterly exhausted and yet rejuvinated. I really hope he sticks around. It would be great for all of us campers if we have Ricardo MWF and Nandoor T/Th so we can work different sets of muscles. And since I've missed a few weeks due to being sick and then out of town, I'll be going 4x a week for the next 3 weeks so I can maximize the benefits before Christmas.

I haven't cried over Grandpa yet. I expect it will hit me later, or not at all. He lived a full life and while he was in such pain at the end, he's finally at peace and that's where he should be.

Thanksgiving is coming! I love this holiday and all the food that comes with it. We are hosting this year and I'm afraid it's going to rain. The plan is to eat on the rooftop deck but if it is raining...well, we have enough chairs. We'll just be cozy. I'm making 3 pies, cranberry sauce, and green bean casserole. I might make an appetizer too, we'll just have to see how adventurous I'm feeling. I'm a bit nervous about the pies. I am making my own crust this year - it's Mom's recipe - and we all know how I get when I open up that box! But I'm going to do my best. I've never made pie crust before. To my Aunt Diane - I will be calling you! :)

P.S. Thank you IRS and our awesome accountant for the nice refund this year!

Results

This is my 4th week of Fitness Bootcamp and I'm already noticing fabulous results. Already my arms are stronger and more defined - my biceps are really strong - and my triceps are starting to get more definition. Also, I'm excited for the day when I will not "wave goodbye with my whole arm". My waist is getting smaller and my shirts are looser. Matt and my friends say they can notice weight loss in my face, neck, and waist. My legs aren't looking as good as I'd like them to, but that will come with time as I've already signed up for the next session.

Today while we were doing lunges, I was thinking of all the reps I had done this morning, and how without this class, I'd give up so much sooner than going the full hour. Here's what I think I did today:

Ran/walked 2 miles at least;

3 or 4 sets of lunges (20 each), push ups (various applications, probably over 50), crunches (60), and I'm sure there's more, I just can't remember them all.

Running up the hill backwards...twice;

Monday we did the Bermuda Triangle, which is basically this giant planter that you step on with one leg all the way around, and usually Ricardo (the trainer) has us go around it twice on each leg. Sometimes 3 times. And then you run up the stairs 3-5 times. And then go for a running lap...you get the idea. Anyway, my hamstrings are still sore from the planter on Monday and today during my laps I seriously thought my upper legs had turned into lead. But you just push through and walk when you have to. Suddenly, you're further along than you thought!

I take a nap (after a shower and breakfast) from about 10 to noon because my body is so exhausted. And even with that, I am sleeping better at night and feeling much better about myself. Hubby is swimming over 3 miles a week, and both of us are significantly noticing how much better we feel about ourselves and each other.

P.S. As most of you know, we went to Spokane recently to visit my Dad's side of the family. Please see hubby's blog for a recount of our travels.