Friday, June 29, 2012

Growing Growing Growing

Wesley is growing like a weed.  Already in 3 to 6 month pajamas because his legs are too long and feet too big for strictly 3 month pj's.  It's incredible.  And a little frazzling, because suddenly I find myself needing to sort through clothes that were "too big" just a few weeks ago.  Amazing.

I have to save some stuff (like photos) for the 4 month letter, but let me just say that I LOVE this three month phase -- the talking, cooing, recognition -- LOVE LOVE LOVE.  He's suddenly a little boy and quite an opinionated one at that.

I'm doing fine, and so is hubby.  Just tired and busy as usual, discovering a new balance to life.  It leaves little time for just the two of us, but we try to find time when we can.  I'm pretty much full time Mommy while he's writing, producing, auditioning people for the next film, stuff like that.  My work happens during naptime.  The in-laws have been just stellar with helping around the house and babysitting, it's been awesome.  Hubby and I are in for a very rude awakening when they head back to India on Tuesday.  But they'll be back in December for Christmas, and Wesley will be mobile by then, driving us bonkers and entertaining us in new ways.

And lots of hugs and love to three expectant Mamas due next month - Kayla, Annie, and Cindy - you are going to ROCK at mommy-dom!   Love you!!

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Relationships

I didn't realize how hard it would be to maintain my friendships, whether they have kids or not.  I didn't know that texting and email would be so much easier.  And I didn't think that my guilt could get so out of control over something so small.

I struggle with guilt often.  I want to be a good person, a good friend, to go above and beyond to be there for friends and family.  And when I fall short, I feel like I've failed.  I feel like suddenly someone is mad at me if I don't get a text or email back right away (which dates back to before mommyhood, when really, they're just as busy, if not more so, than I am).  And I've been falling short a lot these days.  I know it's all in my head.  I know that I'm doing the best I can, that I am a new Mommy and that little Wesley is my main relationship for the next several months.  But I don't want to take advantage of my friends and family...

So I guess, in my own way, this is a public apology for the unanswered emails, phone calls, and text messages.  For canceling or rescheduling at the last minute, sleeping through our get togethers, appearing bleary eyed and exhausted.  I know that you understand, and will tell me not to feel bad, but I do.  I just want you to know how much I appreciate the talks, the emails, the words of support mean so much to me.  The babysitting, the meals, the hand me down clothes...every little thing means the world to me and our little family.

Monday, June 11, 2012

13 Weeks!

My sweet Wesley,

My goodness, how time has flown!  You keep us so busy these days that Mommy hardly has time to think about writing blog posts, let alone water the garden or go grocery shopping.  Priorities.  You keep them in check.

Papa G and Gigi, Daddy's parents, arrived at the end of May and you finally got to meet them.  Gigi is SO in love with you, she spends almost all of her time talking to you, singing, making faces and sounds, and you just eat it up.  It's been wonderful to have them here, and she even lets Mommy and Daddy get a full eight hours of sleep at night so that we can be better parents and less crazy.

In the last few weeks, you have really changed.  You are no longer just a baby, but a little person.  You HATE being hungry or having a dirty diaper.  You are still a grunter, so people always think you're pooping.  You love being warm, not cold.  Bath time isn't so bad now that we bathe you in your tub in the kitchen sink rather than in the bathroom.  You have discovered your legs are for kicking, so you just kick kick kick in your chair, on the floor, in your crib, on your changing table (which makes changing poopy diapers especially messy), wherever you can.  It's a great workout for you and leads to a nice long nap afterwards.

You've also started talking more, and by talking I mean lots and lots of cooing and high pitched happy sounds.  You love being in the kitchen when we're cooking, watching and listening to all the different sounds and conversation.  Where ever there is light, whether it's a window or a light bulb, your eyes go right to it.  Your eyes are focusing a lot more now, and you lock onto Mommy frequently and follow me around the room.  Your eyebrows are quite expressive, they are usually one of the first things people notice about you when you're awake, and we know immediately how you're feeling.  You've even raised just one eyebrow a few times, which is quite comical on such a little person.

You've also discovered your hands and mouth, and have almost figured out that one goes to the other.  Gigi told me the other day how you managed to put your binky back in your mouth all by yourself!

You have such a sweet disposition.  Usually you don't cry unless you're hungry, tired, and/or overstimulated.  Such a happy baby, and such a charmer!  Those big blue eyes are soaking up everything they can.  I love to watch your little brain working, trying to figure everything out, especially when I take you to a new place.

Speaking of which, this last weekend was very busy, but you did GREAT!  Thursday I took you to the set of JourneyQuest 2 to visit Daddy so we could show you off.  Friday and Saturday you met lots of family members, and yesterday I took you to book club to introduce you to more people.  It was pretty clear by the end of the meeting that you were completely done with people and wanted to go home.

The biggest news, however, is that right at 3 months, you put yourself on a schedule.  I don't know if the little schedule we had you on had anything to do with it.  During the day, we'd wake you every 2 hours to feed and change your diaper, and then let you sleep however long you wanted to at night.  Well, you were up for about 18 hours straight one day, driving us up the wall, as it was just the three of us.  But that night, you slept for 3-5 hours at a stretch, waking only to feed and get your diaper changed.  And it's been going on for almost 2 weeks!  Amazing, and wonderful.  Thank you for the extra sleep, little one.  Mommy and Daddy (and Gigi and Papa G) are very very grateful.

I can't believe how much you've changed since you came home three months ago. I am so amazed and delighted at your self discovery each and every day, how the same chandelier at home makes you grin and coo every time we burp you on the couch.  You are my little man, my sweet boy, and I'm so happy that I get to be your Mommy.

I love you so much.  There are no words to really express just how much I love you.

Love,
Mommy