Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Loss and Gain

This year has been an interesting one.  I've had many friends move away, and they're not done yet.  It's difficult for me to see my friends go as they're my family down here.  We all rely on each other, see and support one another through ups and downs.  Every time one leaves, I feel as though I've been "dumped".  I know that sounds harsh, but when then latest friends told me they were leaving, I just burst into tears.  I can't help it.  Even when I was little, I was incredibly attached to my friends, never wanting them to leave, always feeling like there was just never enough time...to do or say what, I'm not sure, but I still feel that way now.  That there's just not enough time with the people I care for.  

I got my hubby back though, after him being away for 9 days location scouting in WA.  It's prompted a huge and long drawn-out talk about the future and what we want to do.  However, as my MIL says:  "If you want to make God laugh, make a plan."  So we're keeping our options slightly open because life is definitely full of surprises.  But in the meantime, I'm working hard to stay on track.  I have goals and I plan to see them through.  When they'll happen, well, I can't plan everything.  Sometimes I just have to be flexible and patient.  

I also became a fan of the bootcamp I attended all last week!  I am so proud of myself.  It was my free week and since I enjoyed it so much and did so well, they're offering me a payment plan so I can afford to go back for the six week special.  I plan on going every day or as much as possible so I can really get in shape and feel better about myself, feel more confident.  I'm lucky to have a spouse who thinks I'm beautiful and tells me so every day.  I just wish I could feel that way about myself that often.  But back to bootcamp, it's run by these 2 amazing women who really work with you to see your fitness goals through while working with your individual limitations.  I'm excited to see what differences I'll have in 6 weeks! 

1 comment:

Mary said...

At least we are both still hanging in here!