There's this phrase that keeps circling the house: "Any day now, she could go." Yes, that's true. Last night Dad asked Katie and I if we wanted to be woken up should Mom pass during the night. We both said "No thanks." He also said that it could take the coroner 24 hours to show up to the hosue to take her away and would we want to say good bye before she left the house? "No thanks. Don't want memory of Mom not alive in the house." Dad said he wanted us to have the choice, which I appreciated, but I think Katie and I will stay downstairs at that point, until she leaves. I want to keep my memories of my mother alive. I think she'd understand. Dad seemed to.
For those of you who wanted to come visit and I've canceled, for those of you who have emailed and I've not responded, please bear with me. I have reached the point where I'm talked out. I feel like there's nothing new for me to say. I mean, I know what's going on in my life, and so do you. Tell me what's going on in your life. Remind me that there is a life after all this is over, that I'll get out of this house, be able to talk above a whisper, and my first thought in the morning will not be "I wonder if she made it through the night."
2 comments:
I finally got a TV in my bedroom. I think you made a good choice. It rained all day today. You are strong strong girl. I ate tuna rolls and laughed w/ my friend Jackie. You are in my thoughts. I love Nicole Richie. Remember to smile.
baby girl, there is no right or wrong where this stuff is concerned. Just do what feels right for you, your mom will want whatever you want. But (as I've been in your shoes) be open to the possibility of changing your mind.
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